Let me share an eyebrow raising story of a cow and a pig. One day a man went for a walk and it suddenly started raining heavily, so he took shelter under a tree. Under there he saw a cow and a pig, the two entered into a conversation and the man overheard them. The pig said to the cow,” How is it that everybody appreciates you and nobody appreciates me? When I die, I provide people with bacon, ham and sausages. People can also use my bristles. I give three or four things, whereas you give only one thing, milk. Why do people appreciate you all the time and not me?”
The cow said to the pig, ”Look I give them milk while I’m alive. They see that I am generous with what I have. But you don’t give them anything while you are alive. Only after you’re dead do you give ham, bacon and so forth. People don’t believe in the future, they believe in the present. If you give while you are alive, people will appreciate you.”
In this story we can see two types of thought processes one of being a piggy bank, hoarders or the pigs who only provide for the future legal rights to money or cash cows alike the cows who give the authority to money right away,maybe pampering.
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Hoarders are a style where the parents go to extremes to save money for the future of the child. They tend to push their expenditure to the minimum and maximise savings. This type of parenting style believes in leaving a legacy and writing fortune wills for their children. But who knows whether they would need it then.
On the other hand, Cash cows are a style where the parents provide whatever they can for a child at the moment, not giving much consideration for the future. They tend to spend money pay check-to-pay check and live within the means they earn without much savings or investments for the future. These parents believe in the now and end up pampering their child. It also warps the child's idea of money and how to spend and save it.
Cash cows are usually appreciated at the beginning stages by the child. On the other hand, hoarders usually have a sour relationship with their child as they feel unwanted or unseen. Whatever they demand it's always critically acclaimed and postponed for the future.
Both these styles are taking things to an extreme and can affect your child and his perception and relationship with money in a negative way. There needs to be a balance between the styles to care for both the present and the future.
A balanced way could always be worked out, just like the parents in the west, where the children are being taught the importance of money while growing up and are given complete control when they turn of age and maturity, say ages 18 or 21. They are often found living separate from their parents and planning their lives, career, partner and everything that affects them. This authorises them to take lead and allows them to develop their own money managing habits early into their lives.
All parents want to look out for their child’s future but remember do not neglect the child’s present just for their future.
Plan ahead but live present. Revisit the old thoughts with a new perspective.
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